stdClass Object
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    [ID] => 14169
    [post_author] => 4
    [post_date] => 2013-10-08 17:10:30
    [post_date_gmt] => 2013-10-08 17:10:30
    [post_content] => After ‘Klokkar’, by Sofie Paulsgård

and sometimes, when I’m woken
by the night train to Central Station,
the carriages swallowed southwards
at the start of the long route home,
I hold my hand against your chest
until your body becomes mine,
my body yours
and still hours until dawn.

when the sea’s tongue traces
the pale skin of the sand,
when the evening drives rooks
with a whip-crack from
the stark black trees,
when the first snow lashes in
and the houses blaze
like pyres against the dark.

when our shadows flow together
like melting tar,
when the air thickens around me
and I hold my hands out
and ache for the rain,
when, sometimes, I lie awake
in the night, your hand in mine
and our whole lives ahead – so little time.
    [post_title] => Clocks
    [post_excerpt] => 
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    [comment_status] => closed
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    [post_name] => clocks
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    [post_modified] => 2015-11-26 13:51:59
    [post_modified_gmt] => 2015-11-26 13:51:59
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    [post_parent] => 0
    [guid] => http://poems.poetrysociety.org.uk/?post_type=poems&p=14169
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    [post_type] => poems
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            [wpcf-published-in] => 
            [wpcf-date-published] => 2013
            [wpcf-summary-description] => Jacob translated ‘Klokkar’ by Sofie Paulsgård from the original nynorsk, in response to our translation challenge.

Translator’s notes: Strictly, this is a translation from nynorsk, rather than non-existent ‘Norwegian’. Thanks to poets like Olav H Hauge and Tarjei Vesaas, there’s a strong tradition of writing in dialects rather than the more formal bokmål (‘book language’).

The poem is a steady build-up of images which have some connection to time, from the night train on its way to Oslo (‘sentralstasjonen’) to the first winter snow. There are no major barriers to the translator here, although I think it’s important to preserve the original poem’s final couplet (the ‘mi/tid [silent d!]’ end rhyme becomes ‘mine/time’ in English), and to preserve the anaphora of the first stanza (the first line begins ‘av og til’, and both ‘av’ and ‘og’ are carried through the opening stanza).

On the whole, this is perhaps a more literal translation than my version of ‘Escrito con tinta verde’, although I’ve made a number of deliberate changes to improve the sound of the poem in English (to my ear, at least). For example, I’ve translated ‘kolsvarte’ in the second stanza as ‘stark black’, in the hope that there’s an onomatopoeic quality to ‘whip-crack… from the stark black trees.’
            [wpcf-rights-information] => 
            [wpcf-poem-award] => Winner, Translation Challenge 2013
            [wpcf_pr_belongs] => 
        )

    [poet_data] => stdClass Object
        (
            [ID] => 13653
            [forename] => Jacob 
            [surname] => Silkstone
            [title] => Jacob Silkstone
            [slug] => jacob-silkstone
            [content] => Jacob Silkstone is a winner of the Young Poets Network 'Translation' challenge.
        )

)
stdClass Object
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    [ID] => 13653
    [forename] => Jacob 
    [surname] => Silkstone
    [title] => Jacob Silkstone
    [slug] => jacob-silkstone
    [content] => Jacob Silkstone is a winner of the Young Poets Network 'Translation' challenge.
)

Clocks

Jacob Silkstone

After ‘Klokkar’, by Sofie Paulsgård

and sometimes, when I’m woken
by the night train to Central Station,
the carriages swallowed southwards
at the start of the long route home,
I hold my hand against your chest
until your body becomes mine,
my body yours
and still hours until dawn.

when the sea’s tongue traces
the pale skin of the sand,
when the evening drives rooks
with a whip-crack from
the stark black trees,
when the first snow lashes in
and the houses blaze
like pyres against the dark.

when our shadows flow together
like melting tar,
when the air thickens around me
and I hold my hands out
and ache for the rain,
when, sometimes, I lie awake
in the night, your hand in mine
and our whole lives ahead – so little time.