stdClass Object
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    [ID] => 17124
    [post_author] => 16
    [post_date] => 2014-06-30 10:06:34
    [post_date_gmt] => 2014-06-30 10:06:34
    [post_content] => [embed]https://vimeo.com/101073841[/embed]
Images: Experimental go-pro video @ Marieke Helmus (shot at Ameland, Holland), 2014
 

In between hunts, when I lie in the grasses
And practise the stillness of death,
I have been thinking hard.
And I believe, Father, that what is gone is certitude.
We learnt the loss of you in between licks,
When we asked where our bull elephant,
Our antlered stag, our spring-spout was.
Mother said you were a wanderer, that all men are,
You were never going to be around for long.
I do my best without you. I rise
As I believe you rose, as I saw Mother
Surge, all dappled haunches, in the den.
Like her, only heavier. For I think you would stand
With all the thunder-strength of muscled cloud.
Now I am big as she said you were and I would be,
Eye-level with the lightning-riven tree.
But she was wrong as well, said you were wandering
Through forests longer than the sky is high,
Forests full of other fathers. I have looked for you.
I have walked the orange day and the black night.
But I could not even find the forests, could not
Even find the way to you. All I found was men
And the carcasses of lands they leave behind.
Father I am afraid for you, lost somewhere
I cannot help, somewhere I cannot even see.
But Father, I am still more afraid for me.
    [post_title] => Tigerless
    [post_excerpt] => 
    [post_status] => publish
    [comment_status] => closed
    [ping_status] => closed
    [post_password] => 
    [post_name] => tigerless-2
    [to_ping] => 
    [pinged] => 
    [post_modified] => 2019-02-27 17:54:27
    [post_modified_gmt] => 2019-02-27 17:54:27
    [post_content_filtered] => 
    [post_parent] => 0
    [guid] => http://poems.poetrysociety.org.uk/?post_type=poems&p=17124
    [menu_order] => 0
    [post_type] => poems
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    [meta_data] => stdClass Object
        (
            [wpcf-published-in] => 
            [wpcf-date-published] => 2014
            [wpcf-summary-description] => This poem was a winner in the Cape Farewell challenge #1 on Young Poets Network (YPN) in 2014.
            [wpcf-rights-information] => 
            [wpcf-poem-award] => Winner, Cape Farewell Challenge #1 2014
            [wpcf_pr_belongs] => 
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    [poet_data] => stdClass Object
        (
            [ID] => 13732
            [forename] => Rachel
            [surname] => Lewis
            [title] => Rachel Lewis
            [slug] => rachel-lewis-2
            [content] => Rachel Lewis is a winner of Young Poets Network Dramatic Monologue, Cape Farewell, and Ways to be Wilder poetry challenges. She was also a commended Foyle Young Poet in 2009 and 2012.
        )

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stdClass Object
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    [ID] => 13732
    [forename] => Rachel
    [surname] => Lewis
    [title] => Rachel Lewis
    [slug] => rachel-lewis-2
    [content] => Rachel Lewis is a winner of Young Poets Network Dramatic Monologue, Cape Farewell, and Ways to be Wilder poetry challenges. She was also a commended Foyle Young Poet in 2009 and 2012.
)

Tigerless

Rachel Lewis


Images: Experimental go-pro video @ Marieke Helmus (shot at Ameland, Holland), 2014
 

In between hunts, when I lie in the grasses
And practise the stillness of death,
I have been thinking hard.
And I believe, Father, that what is gone is certitude.
We learnt the loss of you in between licks,
When we asked where our bull elephant,
Our antlered stag, our spring-spout was.
Mother said you were a wanderer, that all men are,
You were never going to be around for long.
I do my best without you. I rise
As I believe you rose, as I saw Mother
Surge, all dappled haunches, in the den.
Like her, only heavier. For I think you would stand
With all the thunder-strength of muscled cloud.
Now I am big as she said you were and I would be,
Eye-level with the lightning-riven tree.
But she was wrong as well, said you were wandering
Through forests longer than the sky is high,
Forests full of other fathers. I have looked for you.
I have walked the orange day and the black night.
But I could not even find the forests, could not
Even find the way to you. All I found was men
And the carcasses of lands they leave behind.
Father I am afraid for you, lost somewhere
I cannot help, somewhere I cannot even see.
But Father, I am still more afraid for me.